People date for a whole range of reasons - for fun, for sex, for validation, or because they feel they have to.
But we’re here to help people who are ready to date for love.
We help men and women, seeking heterosexual relationships*, who are looking for someone to share the next chapter of their life with.
If you’re seeking a long-term, committed relationship, are ready to refine your dating strategy, and want to show your best self to potential partners, it’s time to consider working with a dating and relationship coach.
*We believe that people should be supported by coaches who understand their lived experiences. If you’re part of the LGBTQIA+ community, and are looking for coaching in dating and relationships, contact us and we can recommend you to a trusted coach who can support you.
What are you dating for?
Take the quiz: uncover your DATING STRATEGY
We’ve been working to understand how different people approach attraction since 2016. We call this The Dating For Love Method.
The DFL Method is based on 4 recognisable archetypes - or models of behaviour when it comes to attraction. When you understand these archetypes, you can use them like a map to orient yourself toward strengths and improve your weaknesses.
Each archetype reflects key ingredients of a healthy relationship: being safe, effective, warm and sexy. They’re designed to help you identify and develop core dating and relationships skills, and communicate these skills to a potential partner.
Our framework will help you to get clear on what you really bring to a relationship - the good and the bad - and begin to understand what areas you need to work on to build a relationship from a place of mutual respect and love.
Our Method
The secret to dating for love is knowing how to create a spark and turn it into sustainable attraction.
Your Dating & Relationship Coaching Team
Meet Jiveny & Joe
“Once upon a time, I KNEW I had a lot to offer. But, I had no idea how to attract the kind of partner I wanted. Someone who would allow me to experience a truly satisfying relationship that was fun, nurturing, passionate AND secure…"
By the time I reached my early 20s I was already jaded in love. I remember walking along a beach one day and thinking to myself: Does romantic love even exist? I wondered because I hadn’t experienced anything close to what was depicted in fairy tales, love songs and rom-coms.
I had fallen in love and out of love. Chased bad love and ran away from good love. Mistaken lust for love and rejected potential love in the pursuit of lust.
- It was all very confusing.
Then, finally I thought that I had found ‘the one’...
…Until he broke my heart and left me stranded in a foreign city on my own. 😢
But you know what? (It’s better that way - I probably wouldn’t be a very good dating coach if I hadn’t experienced all these things!)
In fact, it was the pain of that last heartbreak that really forced me to dive deeper, show up, look within and ‘do the work’.
And even though both of my parents are relationship therapists, it still took me a while to piece together how to successfully navigate the modern dating scene with clarity and insight.
And then, I met…
WE'll sTart our story with jiveny...
“For me, starting a great relationship wasn’t easy. It was one of the hardest and most confusing times of my life..."
One part of me was reeling from my previous relationship and attempting to find a new centre of balance. Another part of me was consumed with the potential of a new spark, and doing my best to play it cool.
I didn’t want to push Jiveny away with my enthusiasm, so I had to pace the connection, and create a middle ground over which we could connect.
I’ve always been a keen learner, and have a great interest in relationship strategies and evolutionary psychology. I also have University degrees in Law, Actuarial Studies and a Masters of Environmental Management.
But learning how to be in a great relationship? That was a whole other matter!
Jiveny and I met on a tram. And even though that sounds like romantic destiny (the age-old story that ‘love just happens’ and is ‘meant to be’) it was really the culmination of the work we’d both done to better ourselves.
Joe
And ultimately, commit to building a healthy relationship!
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Navigate the early dating stages with respect
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Create sustainable attraction
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Date for love and make the most of all opportunities
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To understand what we wanted in life, and in a partner
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coaching for men
coaching for women
We hope to influence current and future generations to experience more loving and supportive relationships, so that these skills can be passed down over time.
We want to equip people with the mindset, skills and strategy to build a healthy relationship, while they also become the best possible version of themselves.
It’s become a bit of an obsession in our home: unpacking, examining and refining what it means to have an effective, holistic approach to dating and relationship building.
And we’re so glad to bring it to you, and help you get results!
Click the buttons below to learn more about:
We want to bridge the education gap, where people aren’t taught how to build and experience a healthy, loving relationship.
together...
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Sheridan, 34 | teacher
I was single for about 10 years before I started working with Jiveny and felt like I had lost my way. I wanted to feel more grounded, trust in my decision making and be genuinely confident and happy with who I was so that I could meet someone to share my life with, but constant overthinking, self sabotage and lack of solid boundaries were holding me back.
Since working with Jiveny, I have developed a relationship with a man who lights up my soul and my smile. He is someone I can fully be myself around, who I can lean on and who I have so much fun and adventure with. He is like no-one I have met before and he brings out a better, stronger and more motivated version of myself and I couldn’t feel more grateful for the relationship we have. After 3 years of dating, we’re now married and parents to a beautiful baby girl!
If I hadn’t made the choice to work with Jiveny, I think I would have continued with the uncertainty, self sabotage and the feeling of being stuck for a long time.
Since working with Jiveny I have developed a relationship with a man who lights up my soul and my smile.
ALEX, 32 | MEN'S WORK FACILITATOR
Jiveny has a warm and non-judgmental approach to coaching. I found it fascinating how her questions opened up new possibilities that could be applied to my relationship with my partner immediately. I felt very comfortable working together as I could see that Jiveny really does care about helping people to have a great relationship - with full expression, while honouring each other’s wants and needs.
Thank you for your gift to the world. It is needed now more than ever before as many of us have very poor education and awareness when it comes to navigating the most intimate relating we will ever do!
A warm and non-judgemental approach to coaching
Aisha, 36 | MARKETING COMMUNICATIONS MANAGER
Before working with Jiveny I had experienced a handful of serious relationships that I had mostly sabotaged. I was also in these relationships for the wrong reasons so I guess they were destined to fail.
I found the work I did with Jiveny ground breaking. I was finally able to get to the bottom of the ‘whys’ and ‘hows’ regarding my failed relationships. She was able to help me to open myself to what I really wanted and let go of what wasn’t working.
I have since found a lifelong partner who I have started a family with. Applying the things I learned from Jiveny to the early stages of our relationship really helped us to progress our connection in a much healthier way. We’ve been together for four years now and have one-year-old twin baby girls. My partner is loyal beyond words - this was something I haven’t really ever been able to say before. He puts his family first and is such a loving and involved father.
I found the work I did with Jiveny ground breaking and have since found a lifelong partner who I have started a family with.
JOSH, 25 | ENGINEER
When I first started working with Jiveny I was plagued with anxiety that I would never get to have a proper girlfriend. I had low self-esteem and struggled with anxiety.
Well to go straight to the biggest point – after working with Jiveny I soon met someone and now we are building a life together. I’ve also worked through some of the intimacy issues that I have had in the past.
This work has allowed me to become a lot more conscious of myself and how I am feeling, taking the time out to ask myself how I am each day. This has really helped to manage my anxiety. Overall, I found working with Jiveny very helpful.
From anxious to a happy, healthy relationship
MARGARET, 70 | RETIRED Researcher
When I first approached Jiveny, I was very fearful that she would not be interested in me because of my age and my, as I saw it then, failure to establish a successful relationship with a man. But, I was so wrong!
From the very beginning, Jiveny was warm, welcoming, perceptive, supportive and positive. The diversity and range of Jiveny’s skills clearly arises directly from the depth of her experience and understanding of human relationships.
This work has been and continues to be a fascinating journey revealing and clarifying much about my inner self resulting in real and very positive change. I love the way she is able to call out my strengths and deepen my perception even when my emotional state or experience feels dark. She provides concrete, empowering insights and techniques which truly work, and always is empathic and supportive!
Illuminating in often unexpected ways
JOHN, 33 | BUILDING SURVEYOR
Jiveny has helped me understand that I needed to work on myself and improve certain areas of my life which I had pushed aside as ‘not important’. Working on these areas has helped me become a more confident person, removed some of my social anxiety and assisted me to step outside of my comfort zone.
Since working together, I have improved my flirting skills and general conversation skills. I have also recognised that most women want a man to take the first step and approach. Together we have worked on developing stronger leadership skills, better understanding women and growing my internal confidence. This has put me in a better position to find the right partner that will complement me in life and has made the dating process a lot easier.
I have improved my flirting and general conversation skills.
Stacey, 34 | Senior Ministerial Adviser
Most of us have not learnt how to date ‘well’ or with clarity or intention. As they say: luck is not a strategy! Between therapy and talking about your dates with your friends, there is an important but untapped space. Jiveny fills this gap, empowering you to tackle the often confusing world of dating and relating with insight and intention. Her coaching equips you with a different kind of confidence and poise that comes from having a handle on some fundamental relationship truths and wisdom.
Now I don’t second guess my partner’s express interest, affection and devotion to me! I feel cherished and adored and cared for in my relationship. I am also getting more comfortable with letting my partner ‘lead’, though it’s still a work in progress! Most of all, I am confident that we are building a sustainable relationship that will carry us throughout our lives; that we are methodically exploring the right and important ‘big questions’ around values, goals and our life journey together.
I credit Jiveny & The Alchemy of Attraction course with setting me up for long-term, sustainable success with a high-quality partner who is literally the man of my dreams.
Lauren, 28 | digital Marketing Executive
Before working with Jiveny I had just come out of a 6-year relationship and was realising I didn’t want to repeat the same mistakes or be with that kind of person again. After working with Jiveny I experienced a major shift in my dating behaviour. I was much more able to identify partners that were not suitable for me and avoid them, as well as understand how to navigate dating better and really get to know a partner as we built the connection.
Best of all this journey has led me to a healthy, fulfilling relationship where I feel a new awareness and confidence! I know what I want and deserve in a partner and I am able to bring my best self to the relationship. I didn’t think it was truly possible to find this kind of relationship before working with Jiveny.
I didn’t think it was truly possible to find this kind of relationship before working with Jiveny.
SEB, 37 | LAWYER
I was disillusioned with my dating life and seeking a long-term healthy relationship so I contacted Jiveny. From our very first session, I felt comfortable and excited to begin working with her.
Through our work, she helped me identify my barriers, clarify what I wanted in a partner and what a healthy relationship looked like. I was also able to identify the mistakes I had been making. This work has really helped me to developed much more confidence in dating and relationship and I was excited to put what we worked on into practice.
I am now in the best relationship I have ever had and excited for the future. I attribute this to the work I did with Jiveny. Whether you are in the dating world or in a relationship, I would not hesitate in recommending Jiveny. She has changed my life for the better, making me the happiest I’ve been in a long time.
Jiveny has changed my life for the better, making me the happiest I’ve been in a long time.
KRISTINA, 30 | PHYSIOTHERAPIST
Before working with Jiveny I was struggling with choosing the wrong men and navigating my insecurities. I wanted a serious, committed relationship but I often had trouble keeping guys interested or would wind up chasing them away. Other times, I would go for an easy guy who liked me (which was never very satisfying).
Since working together, I’ve noticed a huge shift in my mindset and approach to dating for the better. I’m much more able to manage my reactions and approach, allowing the guys I am interested in to come to me.
I’ve now met a great guy who is proactive in building a healthy relationship with me and who puts effort in to keep things fun and interesting. Even better he also takes an interest in personal development and makes open communication feel effortless and natural. Overall, I have been amazed with how much I have learnt and progressed and I cannot recommend Jiveny highly enough!
I have been amazed with how much I have learnt and progressed.
PAUL, 46 | IT MANAGER
I found working with Jiveny was a valuable process of self discovery. It was helpful to learn the small things that can really make a difference in meeting someone as well as strategies to detach from the outcome of an interaction and be more present with women. The insights and exercises helped me to understand the sorts of things I'd done wrong in the past that most women aren't going to overlook.
Her female perspective was helpful because there are just some things we don't learn or pick up on along the way - sometimes someone actually needs to tell us directly. Also, while Jiveny's coaching is primarily focused on helping us to meet people and find that special someone, I found it also gave me a vehicle to figure out the sort of life I want to be living and how to be happy with or without a partner.
Her female perspective was helpful because there are just some things we don't learn or pick up on along the way
TANISHA, 22 | STUDENT
Before working with Jiveny I struggled to attract men who I was genuinely interested in; and whenever I managed to, I found it to be quite the challenge to hold their interest. It made me feel afraid and unworthy constantly; like I needed to prove my worth whenever I felt the other person was uninterested.
I craved to be part of a healthy, committed relationship without having to carry the baggage I’d collated over the years of my childhood. Jiveny has done wonders in showing me where my inner strength was hiding and I learned that it is possible for my wants and needs to be met in a relationship. I’m now 13 months into a new relationship that is healthy and fulfilling and I’d highly recommend Jiveny for anyone looking to refocus their minds and hearts.
I craved to be part of a healthy, committed relationship without having to carry the baggage I’d collated over the years of my childhood.
DANIEL, 25 | RESEARCH ASSISTANT
I would definitely recommend Jiveny to anyone looking for support in their own journey of personal growth. I have found that working with her has made an astronomical difference to my dating life and the relationships I have with my work colleagues and family members.
I have always appreciated Jiveny's approach to understanding what I need and tailoring our sessions accordingly. Jiveny has also offered additional resources for those like me, who love to self learn. All in all, my work with Jiveny has fundamentally changed the way I view the world around me for the better.
Working with Jiveny has made an astronomical difference to my dating life and the relationships
ANNE, 56 | TRAVEL INDUSTRY Executive
Before working with Jiveny I had been meandering the online dating circuit for about 18 months with no real luck beyond a third date. Jiveny helped me to understand the destructive patterns I had created for myself and assisted me in developing a greater awareness of the ways in which I was self-sabotaging my love life.
Throughout our sessions together, I felt a genuine sense of care from Jiveny and never rushed. Her course materials and resources are fantastic and really helped me to get clear on what I want from a relationship and why. The best support has been in understanding the decisions I have made and how these have drawn the wrong kinds of people to me in the past. The tools she has given me to navigate dating and relationships are invaluable.
Best of all, I am now in a healthy long-term relationship with a wonderful man.
The tools she has given me to navigate dating and relationships are invaluable.
ZOE, 31 | PROJECT MANAGER
Jiveny gave me permission to speak openly about some of my deepest fears, anxieties, desires and dreams and was completely present with me as I talked. Her questions guided me to self-assess and reflect on my own beliefs and attitudes in ways that I had never considered before.
Through this, I discovered new ways to think about and overcome habitual thought patterns that had been preventing me from self-acceptance. Most of all, Jiveny helped me identify the deeper core feelings and unmet needs stopping me from living my life fully. After our coaching sessions I've felt a deeper sense clarity, confidence and a true sense of empowerment.
Clarity, confidence and a true sense of empowerment
Life-long student of philosophy, evolutionary psychology, business & personal development.
Co-creator of Dating for Love and The Attraction Styles Method alongside Jiveny.
Trained workshop facilitator and coach since 2018
Studies coaching at The Relationship Coaching Institute, California
JOE
Continued education in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), Timeline Therapy, Emotional Processing and Internal Family Systems (IFS).
Full-time dating & relationship coach since 2016
Graduate International Practitioner of Coaching (The Coaching Institute)
JIVENY
Our Creds:
Co-author of 'How to Make the Biggest Decision of Your Life' published by Hachette in 2021.
work with us
Work closely with Jiveny or Joe on your dating journey. Build a healthy dating mindset, gain a deeper understanding of the blindspots and barriers holding you back, and get personal support on your journey.
1:1 Coaching
(The VIP experience)
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TELL ME MORE
Stop gambling in love, and learn how to transform the cards you’ve been dealt into a winning hand. Learn how to date for love and build sustainable attraction and navigate the modern dating scene with clarity and insight.
Online Coaching Programs
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take the quiz
Disocvering your dating strategy takes you closer to truly understanding the dynamics of attraction, improving your relationship skills, and expanding your opportunities to find a great partner.
Learn your 'Dating Strategy' - take the quiz!
