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How to Not Die Alone by Logan Ury is an interesting book that offers contemporary insights on dating from a data scientist who currently works for the dating app Hinge. Building on her access to millions of people’s dating app data, Ury provides tips for finding a meaningful relationship in the age of dating apps.
With the recent explosion of dating apps and the shift towards virtual introductions, it’s more important than ever to know how to make a great impression online. Ury offers great examples of how to connect with playfulness and authenticity, even in the age of dating apps. In addition to her scientific background, Ury is also a dating coach and matchmaker, so she has plenty of experience to draw upon in her writing.
Particularly interesting is her idea around the three dating types – Romancers, Maximisers & Hesitators. Romancers are looking for something that makes a perfect fairytale, Maximisers are always looking over shoulders for the ‘perfect’ partner, and Hesitators believe that they just need to work on themselves some more and THEN they’ll be ready for love. She makes the point that all three involve unrealistic expectations. Which one do you most resonate with?
One thing we loved about this book is the focus on connecting with playfulness, which we believe is a key element for building loving relationships. Ury also emphasises the importance of seeking a “life partner” rather than just a “prom date,” which is a useful distinction for those still in the teenage mindset of assessing partner compatibility.
Overall, this book is a solid resource for anyone who is single and dating online.